5 Subtle Signs of ADHD in Elementary School Girls
By a Richmond Therapist Specializing in ADHD and Neurodivergent Children
As a child and adolescent therapist based in Richmond, VA, I specialize in working with neurodivergent children—frequently girls who are often missed in early ADHD evaluations. With years of experience supporting elementary school girls with ADHD and high-functioning autism, I’ve seen firsthand how their symptoms often go unnoticed or are misunderstood.
Girls with ADHD often don’t “look” like what people expect. They’re rarely disruptive. Instead, they may be sensitive, people-pleasing, anxious, or constantly daydreaming. If you’re a parent, teacher, or school counselor wondering if a child in your care might be struggling with undiagnosed ADHD, here are five subtle but important signs to watch for:
1. She’s Daydreamy, Not Disruptive
Unlike the common hyperactive stereotype, girls with ADHD often internalize their symptoms. They might seem quiet, distracted, or “off in their own world.” As a licensed therapist with expertise in diagnosing ADHD in girls, I often hear parents say, “She’s so smart, but she just can’t focus.”
💡 Signs to notice: Getting lost in thought, slow to start tasks, needing repeated prompts to stay engaged.
2. She’s Masking—And It’s Exhausting
Girls are often socially motivated and keenly aware of how they’re “supposed” to act. Many become experts at masking their ADHD symptoms. As an ADHD specialist, I frequently work with girls who appear to be doing “fine” at school but fall apart emotionally at home.
💡 Signs to notice: Perfectionism, people-pleasing, and emotional outbursts after a long day of “holding it together.”
3. She’s Sensitive and Spirited
ADHD in girls often overlaps with emotional intensity. As a clinician specializing in executive functioning and emotion regulation in neurodivergent children, I support girls who feel everything big—joy, frustration, sadness, excitement. This isn’t moodiness—it’s a dysregulated nervous system doing its best.
💡 Signs to notice: Big emotional reactions, talking fast or changing topics mid-sentence, or difficulty calming down after being upset.
4. She Forgets… Constantly
Memory and organization challenges—hallmarks of ADHD—often show up as forgetfulness, especially with routines and responsibilities. I often collaborate with teachers in Richmond-area schools to identify these patterns and advocate for executive functioning supports.
💡 Signs to notice: Always losing things, forgetting instructions, or turning in homework that was completed but left at home.
5. She’s Emotionally Drained After School
As a Richmond-based therapist with a focus on ADHD in young girls, I help families understand the “after-school crash.” Many girls seem well-behaved during the day, only to melt down at home. This doesn’t mean they’re manipulative or spoiled—it means their brain is overloaded.
💡 Signs to notice: Mood swings, shutdowns, irritability, or retreating into screens or solitude after school.
Why This Matters:
As a therapist who specializes in ADHD in girls and neurodivergent children, I’m passionate about helping families see past the myths and toward the needs underneath. ADHD in girls is often missed not because the signs aren’t there—but because we haven’t been taught to recognize them.
If you’re a parent in the Richmond area seeking ADHD support for your daughter, or if you’re unsure where to start, I offer thoughtful, evidence-based assessments and ongoing therapy designed specifically for children like yours.
🧠 Want to learn more? Visit www.WesthamptonCounselingGroup.org
📩 Reach out for a free 15-minute consultation here: Schedule Here
About the Author:
Lauren Watson, LPC, is a Richmond-based child therapist with advanced training in ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, and executive functioning. She specializes in helping elementary-aged girls and their families understand and navigate neurodiversity with clarity, connection, and practical support. She is the founder of Westhampton Counseling Group.
